#Not_My_Type
Projects I turn down and why. Expensive lessons from discovery calls with 17 stakeholders, redesigns that hide pricing problems, and other red flags.
The call started normal enough. “We need a redesign. Our retention is terrible and the interface looks dated.” Okay. Tell me more. “Churn is around 15% monthly. Users sign up, use it for a bit, then leave. We think if we modernize the UI, make it feel more premium, people will stick around.” When did…
Let me show you something. This is a Mad Libs for people who can’t articulate their value proposition: The LinkedIn Spiritual Pitch Generator™ Hi [NAME], Your [VAGUE QUALITY] stands out – you carry the signature of a [FLATTERING ROLE] who’s already mastered [THEIR FIELD]. I partner with [ASPIRATIONAL IDENTITY] who are no longer motivated by…
The project was fine. Good product. Clear brief. Reasonable timeline. They paid on time. Nobody yelled at me. I delivered everything they asked for, and they were happy with it. And I was fucking miserable. Four stakeholders. That’s all it took. But here’s what nobody tells you: this is why your product looks like everyone…
